Kaiser, get it? Its etymology traces back to Cæsar (not his entomology, which just bugs people), the greatest of whom was Imperator Caesar Augustus (to his friends, “Bob”; to his enemies, slaves, traitors and to whomever he lost his weekly Scrabble game, “Ohcrapohcrapohcrapohcrap, is that a writ of execution? Seriously? Fine, you get a triple word score on that last one!”). He was also declared a god by the Roman Senate, which is a nice job if you can get it. But there you go: our son, Auggy, is one step closer to his life on top of Mount Olympus.

Because now he’s semi-mobile: